What the hell happened to Craig Hansen?

Does anyone remember Craig Hansen?  Every now and then I think about him and what could have been.

Hansen was once the "closer of the future" for the Red Sox organization when they drafted him with the 26th overall pick.  That draft the team also took Jacoby Ellsbury (23rd) and Clay Buchholz, (42) neither of which were ready for the Major Leagues.

Hansen on the other hand, the team decided he was ready as a late call-up later in the season.  The club hoped that Hansen would supply the same bullpen boost that Fransisco Rodriguez provided for the Angels in their 2002 World Series run.

Hansen had a scoreless debut striking out Toby Hall and Julio Lugo.

The rest of his Red Sox career didnt work out so well as Hansen struggled throughout the remainder of his tenure with the Red Sox.

The 24-year-old got a fresh start in 2008 when he was shipped along with Brandon Moss to the Pittsburgh Pirates in the deal that sent Manny Ramirez to Los Angeles and Jason Bay to Boston.

The fresh start didn't help the relievers career.  He struggled in 21 games for the Pirates.  He had a ginormous 6.95 ERA in 22 innings.

Last seen in the baseball world, Hansen pitched in one game for Pittsburgh's Double-A affiliate Altoona in 2010.

Little is known about the location of Hansen how or why his 2010 season abruptly ended.  There is only speculation as to what he is doing.

One person has speculated to me that Hansen owned and worked on a cheese farm in Altoona Pennsylvania.  His farm was shut down after a short while.  Rumor has it his new career had potential until his farm turned out to have nasty cheese.  **Note**:  Nasty cheese is only good in the realm of baseball.

 Another rumor has Hansen working as a clerk at a local Hannaford Supermarket in the New York area.  He has to take a little pay cut from the one he was getting in Boston and Pittsburgh, but the pressure can't get to him like it did in the Major Leagues.  Hopefully he remembers to not put the twelve-pack of caffeine free pepsi on top of the bread.  I hear elderly women are worse than Red Sox fans if you mess with their bread. 

There was also a lot of muttering at a Chili's just outside of Boston that they just fired Hansen.  He apparently was a cook at the chain for an undetermined amount of time.  The owner apparently got sick and tired of the former Major Leaguer complaining.  He said that Hansen could not handle the heat... so he told him to stay out of the kitchen.

Another person reported they saw Hansen driving a truck late in 2010.  Its a really honest living full of quality individuals I hear.  Lets all hope his control of an 18-wheeler is better than his atrocious control from the mound.  If it isn't we all need to steer clear.

Well, if without further ado I would like to welcome Craig Hansen to the "Where the hell are they! hall of fame."  He will join other former promising Red Sox players Paxton Crawford, Wilton Veras, Brian Rose, Donnie Sadler, Vaughn Eshelman and Morgan Burkhart.

Seriously, what happened to all those guys!